An ode to self-care

Illustration by Iain Duffus

I’ve been in more relationships with people of a different race than me; this is not intentional. Should I try harder to make connections with people of my own race?

If it is not intentional, I wouldn’t say you actively have to make connections with people within your race, but you should take time to sit down and unpack any internalized prejudices that may be subconsciously telling you to date outside your race. Always remember who you are, where you came from and what people have done to ensure you could be with whoever you choose.

In your opinion do you think Okcupid is an accurate gauge of who your match might be and is it a good way to meet people?

OkCupid, Tinder, Bumble and all things of the like can work for people who maybe find themselves in awkward social situations or people who get nervous when they try to approach someone they are interested in. However, I don’t necessarily think romance boots up through modems and wifi signals for certain types of people; those who prefer face-to-face contact and can communicate in social situations.

Is college the best thing an 18 year old can do with their life after high school?

Absolutely not. Firstly, academics and collegiate settings do not work with everyone, and some people prefer going into the workforce, taking a break or going through community college before going to a university. Hell, some people get where they want and need to be with just an Associate’s degree. There is nothing wrong with not going to college and I know we live in this culture of a college degree being needed to get anywhere in life, but that’s not necessarily true for everyone.

Does physical affection equate to feeling attraction towards another person?
Not always. It definitely equates to a physical attraction, but this can’t speak to emotional or other types of attraction. It’s best to find out for you as a person whether or not these are linked or if you can have one without the other.

Do you believe, “friends with benefits” to be impractical? Especially, if you have yet to, but fear you may develop romantic feelings for this person – even though neither of you want a relationship right now.

I think that for you this isn’t something that will work for you. Especially if you know you have the proclivity to develop feelings for whomever you are involved with. Throw in neither of you wanting a relationship or commitment of any sort and you’ve got a recipe for a hot mess. Spare yourself the extra calories.


If you’d like to send Shaun a question you can submit them via email at Jacksonsk@commonwelathtimes.org or anonymously at Lascivious-Witch.Tumblr.Com/Ask  


Shaun Jackson, Staff Columnist

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